These are my funnies

It's been a while since I last posted here. It's because I've spent all my time living in the back seat of my Mazda, writing these cartoons, which I can't draw or animate.

1) (five seconds total) Open on a darkened living room. A bespectacled boy sits on the lap of his mother, who gently rocks while moving her fingertips against his temples. "Massage that bigass brain," she says softly.

2) (30 second total) A man and a woman, both nicely dressed, stand in a small but clean kitchen. Early evening light fills the space. The man is nervous, but not unreasonably so. He pulls a cluster of celery from the fridge, then a pair of potatoes, then a tall jar containing a miniature squid. When he unscrews the cap, the squid climbs out, blindly slapping the man's neck, the man's face, and falls to the floor.

3) (5 seconds) Holding a bursting bag of trash, a man opens a garbage bin outside his apartment only to be startled when a 75-pound bird flaps out and into the sky.